I visited Utah but all I got was two lousy wives.

If you’ve never been at an all-night speakeasy deep in a Western frontier town, where the only thing cheaper than the drinks are the women, and midgets keep the bar clean using their tongues, while management prowls around punching random patrons in the faces, all the while the most beautiful music you’ve ever heard plays on a jukebox that has only one song, then I don’t recommend it.

Prices start at $16.95 and up depending on style and color.
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